because the yarn I'm making it from just isn't working for me. But I don't know. I'm going to let it marinate for a bit longer, though it's been OTN for about a year now. You'd think I'd know by now. Actually, I think I do know, and I just don't want to admit it. After all, I put in a lot of work on this scarf, but I'm just not feeling it. I guess I'd better just close my eyes and do it--like ripping a bandage off.
Later. I'll do it later...
Rylea is back at the vet for a checkup. They wanted to keep her overnight so they can change her splint first thing in the morning and then watch her for a few hours. If I didn't have to be at work before the vet's office opened, I could have brought her in tomorrow. But as it is, it's easier just to let her stay overnight. She is doing ok, though. All her cuts and abrasions are healing well. It's just the joint we're concerned with now.
Now for a bit of serious talk. Have you ever written something that you really liked, but weren't sure you wanted to post it? I've got a couple of posts that I feel that way about. They aren't bad, or controversial or anything. In fact, if I do get around to posting them, you'll read them and wonder what all the fuss was about. But to me, they are so intimate, so personal that by posting them, I really feel that I am making myself completely vulnerable to you, the reader. In my growing up years, keeping my feelings hidden was a necessary survival tactic and even now it is hard for me to share them. What if my innermost feelings are met with scorn and derision? Or worse, no response at all. I wonder at that sometimes. Some of my favorite posts, that I labored over, sweat over, poured my heart into received little or no response. What if that happens with these posts? It'll be like y'all are saying "who cares" about my thoughts, my innermost desires. It reinforces what my mother had told me time and time again when I was a child: "Nobody cares what you think."
I think I'll hold off a bit on posting those. They are still in the rough draft stage anyway. I need to rework them a bit.
5 comments:
I have spilled my guts in my blog and then wondered if I should have done that. And I have written something only to shelve it or delete it knowing that it was just too personal or controversial to post. There is a line in the Bible about casting your pearls before swines. Sometimes, I think some inner thoughts and beliefs are true pearls, but not everyone is ready to see or hear those words. You know your regular readers pretty well, and we will accept you for what ever you are or say.
What bad blog said.
I think it's up to you, because it's up to you, ultimately, how much you reveal of yourself. One thing that's hard on Blogger is that, as far as I know, you can't lock down certain entries or limit who actually reads it. I know on my "regular" blog, I've gotten into the habit of locking down some entries, where only my closest friends who are also on that blogging system can read it, because whether they comment or not, I know that they are the people I would tell anyway. And they do include some people that I only know through blogging, but have gotten to know over time. The other thing, too, is that sometimes when you have revealed a lot, I know for me sometimes I feel there is nothing to say in commenting other than, "oh..." or "glad you feel better" or something else that otherwise sounds contrived. I just absorb the information, quite often, and leave the information as it is, respecting what it is-- a statement of being, and while I might sympathize or understand and appreciate the situation, it doesn't mean that there is something to say in response. You know what I mean? I get that a lot on my TKD blog sometimes. Or any of my blogs, for that matter. So, like I said, it's up to you how much of yourself you want to reveal. If just writing things up in itself feels cathartic, then that's a good thing. ;-)
Have you ever written something that you really liked, but weren't sure you wanted to post it?
I've done the actual writing bits once or twice and decided not to post the results. But I've had literally hundreds of thoughts that haven't made it to the writing stage, simply because they're not appropriate for the "PG-16" tone I want to keep on EIP...which is my only blog. There's the grandkids to think about, the ex-wives to think about (who may or may not read me...BUT...lotsa fodder there!), yadda, yadda.
I've thought about starting an anonymous blog for my...ummm... "racier" war stories, but have always stopped, mainly coz I know how hard it is to build a readership, and I certainly wouldn't link such a blog to/with EIP. Even though I'd change the names in any and all war stories to protect the "innocent" (you may read that as "guilty," if you want).
As far as "putting my stuff out there" on the street for all to see, I don't worry about it all that much. A little, but not a lot. That ol' saying about folks who either sign your paycheck or write your performance review comes into play here. No one in that category reads my blog. And most everyone who DOES read my blog has the great good sense to observe the "if you can't say anything NICE..." maxim. I think the same thing is true here, Becky.
I often write about the sticky stuff in my other blog. There I know that I am safe because no one knows me and if I ask for advice or comment they come my way. Most of the time I just don't care if anyone comments since it is my stuff and usually just needs to be written down in order to get out of my head. However, I often wonder if my hubby reads that blog since he knows where it is, but I don't think he does. Anyway, writing from your heart is so important, especially if it's something from the gooey innards that needs a bit of airing out. Does it matter that much if no one comments or if the comments are unsavory? I suppose it does on some level. But we, your readers, are here to support you in whatever you choose to put down in a post, whether it be light and fluffy or dark and scary. Those scary parts take a bit of time to come out, so I'm validating your hesitation to write them in your blog. They are good no matter what you write!
Karrie
Post a Comment