I work with a lady. She is 35 and fairly recently divorced. Well, within the last couple or three years. She had three sons, the oldest of which is Cody's age--13, and she still wears a size 2 jean. Sigh-- But that's not what I'm here to talk about. Her boyfriend is 19. They are very much in love and even talking about getting married.
Now, I'm not going to be one of those snooty know-it-alls and say that they shouldn't, that she is robbing the cradle, that they couldn't possibly really be in love due to the age difference, that their relationship is just wrong. No, if that is what they want, then I'm happy for them.
It's just not what I want.
The experience, the wisdom, the depth of character that comes with age--you just can't find that in a teenager.
4 comments:
One of the longer standing marriages I know has a 17-year age difference. From knowing both participants extremely well, I would say that the deeper, more mature and complex personality is the younger of the two.
Not to say that I'd go out and hunt for a teenager - but there might be some out there I would consider, were I in the market.
I am with you on this, Becky. At nineteen, I doubt a young man really knows what he wants in life. He may be well satisfied now, but later it could be a real problem. I think for an older woman to marry such a young man is just selfish. I think of all the things I want for my son in life and marriage, I assume other mothers feel the same way. I would think this woman would want those things for her children as well as this young man. Did that make sense?
Nice ear!
The Second Mrs. Pennington's second husband is younger than my middle son by a few months. There's 12 years between them, she being the eldest, of course. And they seem to get along fairly well.
For what that's worth, and it ain't worth much, LOL!
Please don't misunderstand. I'm not opposed to relationships in which there is a significant age difference. There are several of them in my own family. My parents were 14 years apart, and I have two cousins who have 10 year and 18 year spans in their respective marriages. I'm not going to tell others that they shouldn't have such a relationship. It's just not what I want.
Cindy, while I acknowledge that there are exceptions to every rule, but when I speak of depth of character and maturity, I'm referring to that found in normal, emotionally healthy persons who have appropriate levels of maturity for their ages.
Even so, no matter how mature he may be, there is just no way a teenager can have had the experiences in life that a 40 or 50 year old has had.
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