Exhaustion

I didn't even recognize myself.

Last night as I was getting ready for bed, I looked at my reflection in the bathroom mirror, and I didn't even recognize myself. My face was drawn. My skin was pale. My bloodshot eyes just two tiny orbs in the midst of black, puffy circles.

I looked like death warmed over.

Scratch that.

I just looked like death.

I stared at my corpse like image a moment, then took my weary self to bed, where I attempted to snatch what few precious moments of sleep that I could. I woke up this morning feeling not much better, wishing I could be one of those stay at home moms who can lay around all day and just get over this. But I'm not. I'm the breadwinner. I'm the sole support for this family. I have to go to work. I have no choice.

I'm exhausted. Literally. I get home from work and I'm so tired I'm staggering. My head is spinning. I can't think. I can't do anything. I just collapse.

Thankfully, tomorrow is another step down day in my steroid dosage. I'm hoping that with each step down in steroids will come a step up in my ability to sleep. Slowly I will return to the land of the living.

Thankfully, tomorrow is always Saturday, and I can pretty much lay around all day. If I can drag my weary butt to the store this evening, that is.

Or maybe not.

.