Telephones

I work in a job that is basically a no-brainer, and as such, I have a lot of time to just think about stuff.  Its strange the things you sometimes think of when your mind isn't otherwise occupied.

There was this boy I went to high school with.  We weren't really friends, but I had a lot of classes with him throughout junior high and high school.  One day we were in class, and he was telling the story of a girl--a class mate of ours--and how she would call him all the time and just talk and talk and talk.  She drove him crazy.  Finally, he got an idea.  When he was tired of talking to her, he'd ask his parents to yell at him to get off the phone.  He said his dad was cool.  He'd just yell across the room, "RANDY!  Get off the phone!"  The first time he asked his mother, though, she came up to him and said, "Randy, dear, I really need you to get off the phone."

He was like, "Aww mom!" 


Moving right along....

I was in fourth grade, or thereabouts, when one day I couldn't remember my homework assignment.  I got the phone book to look up a classmate's number.  As I was searching for her number, I found another classmate's number.  "Oh, here is James' number.  I'll call him.  He'll know."  At that moment, my mother rounded the corner, arms a-flailing and eyes a-blazing. "Girls do not call boys on the phone!  It's not proper!"

"But mom", I countered. "It's not like I was going to ask him out on a date.  I'm just calling him about school work."  But my mother was adamant,  girls do not call boys on the phone under any circumstances. 

Fast forward to 6th grade...my little boyfriend called me on the phone.  I was unavailable at the moment.  My mother told him to call back in about 15 minutes.  He did.  "What were  you doing?" he asked.

"Oh, I was using the bathroom," I replied.  At that moment, my mother rounded the corner, arms a-flailing and eyes a-blazing.  "Girls do not tell boys they were in the bathroom!" 

"Why not?", I asked.  "They have to go, too."  But my mother was adamant.  Girls do not tell boys they actually *ahem* use the bathroom.

I think this may be where my phone issues come from.  My older brother had phone issues, too.  His freshman year at college, he was unable to find a ride home for the Thanksgiving break.  What did he do?  He wrote my parents a letter.  They got it the day he was supposed to be coming home.  My dad got off work that evening, and had to immediately set out driving 4 hours to Marshall, TX to pick up my brother.  They took the younger kids with them, but told me I could stay home if I wanted to.  I was 17, and they would have let me stay home alone, but I didn't really feel comfortable doing that.  I chose to go stay with my grandparents instead.

I was waiting for them to come pick me up, and they didn't come.  Six o'clock passed, then seven.  Finally I called my grandpa and asked him what time he was coming to get me.  "At 9:00," he snapped, then sneeringly added, "Is that OK with you?"

I have a terrible aversion to using the phone ever since. 

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