Random Thoughts Of St. Valentine's Day

 1.  Look!  I got a Valentine!

It's from my friend Belinda, who didn't get around to sending Christmas cards, so sent these instead.  Thank you!  It made my day!

2.  Guess what it's doing again...go on guess!  Here's a hint: 

3.  Well, they took away our overtime, but I suspect it won't be for long.  When we get behind again, they'll start hooting and hollering that they don't have any headers and we'll be coming in at 4:00 again.  Of course, their precious second shift is still working 10 hours, because you know we have to let them do whatever they want.  

4.  I got a bit of a scare this afternoon, when I got a call from my water company telling me I hadn't paid my bill.  I know I had, and found the receipt still laying on my kitchen cabinet.  Where I'd left it....a week ago....OK, moving right along...I tried calling, but apparently everyone else was trying to all, too, because I kept getting a busy signal.  Off to their Facebook page I went, where I saw the announcement.  It was a glitch in the automated system.  Instead of calling just those who were past due, it was calling everyone in the system. Whew!  I've lived here 28 years, and that's the first time that's ever happened. 

5.  Just FYI

6.  Speaking of St. Valentine's day, it was originally observed as a Christian holiday remembering St. Valentine, who was martyred on this day in 269 A.D., for refusing to renounce his faith in Jesus Christ. He is also the patron saint of love, marriage, affianced couples, and plague. That being said, Happy Valentine’s Day to all those afflicted by the plague.

7. I got called out on FB the other day. Or at least, someone made a pretty pathetic attempt to call me out. Observe:

I had to laugh.  Seriously?  Evil?  Sister, this is trash talk.  It's an essential part of sports culture, and moreover, this is actually baby talk compared to some of the stuff out there.  If this poor fragile person is that triggered by my saying Cry, Eagles, Cry, she'd never even survive seeing some of the real trash talk out there. The bright spot is, I mean, other than it being absolutely hysterical, she blocked me.  No big loss.  All she did was lay in bed all day posting selfies.  Of herself laying in bed.  All day.  About 20 selfies per day.  Of herself laying in bed.  I'm actually glad I don't have to see that any more.  

8.  Where have all my readers gone?  I mean, I've never been that popular, but still..

9.  I don't know if I'm even going to fool with a flower bed this year.  I might just leave it and see if any of my wildflowers from last year seeded.  All of my little bluebonnets I had planted got whacked by the hard freeze we had just before Christmas.  Maybe others will come up.  I don't know.  I hope so, but it's not looking good.  

10.  Group Leader Shark brought us lunch today.  The plant is feeding us tomorrow for having the highest efficiency since 2106 for the month of January.   Free food two days in a row.  Thank you!  

11.  I think I'll go knit a while now.  Laters. 

Viking Valentines

Hey Girl,

I just met you and this is crazy,

But here's my broadaxe

Let's pillage,

Maybe

Happy Valentine's Day

I wish we could take cameras in to work. I don't know why we can't. I mean, it's not like we have any big secrets or anything. They just don't want us taking pictures inside the plant. Still, I would have loved to have captured the expressions on TK and The Other Rod's faces when I gave them their hats.

Vanessa got there first, since she comes in at 6 with me. She gushed appropriately over her hat and cookies. I took the little bear --who has finally been bestowed with a moniker, which I'll tell you about in a minute-- also, and she thought he was so cute. I was afraid for a moment that I'd have to give him to her, but no, he came back home with me.

He caused quite a stir among the guys.  TK wanted to know who he was for.  The Other Rod wanted to know who he was from.  Marcus also wanted to know who he was from, and I just replied, "From someone who thought enough of me to get me a Valentine, which is more than I can say for you!"  To which Marcus just ducked his head and went back to work.  What more could he say?  I wish I'd thought of that when The Other Rod asked.  I'd have told him that, too.

The little feller's name is Desmond Anthony Barber II, but I call him Kenny for short.  Now you may be wondering how I got Kenny out of Desmond Anthony Barber II.  Well, I'll tell you...that's just how my mind works.

Ah, but I digress...

I gave TK his hat and little pack of cookies next, and he asked, "is this for me?"  I replied in the affirmative, and he just kind of gruffly said, "appreciate it", but he couldn't quite hide the smile that crept over his face.

Then The Other Rod came in, and true to form, he was wearing a red shirt.  I gave him his hat and said, "I made this one for you, because I know you like red."  He, like TK, just said, "appreciate it" but he couldn't hide his smile either.

I hope they really liked them, and weren't just being polite.    

Oh and for the record:

Desmond--Desmond (Dez) Bryant
Anthony-- Tony Romo (whose real name is Antonio, but I like Anthony better)
Barber--Marion Barber (how can I celebrate a day of love without mentioning him?)
II--Felix Jones II


Later, I left work early, I told The Other Rod and TK that I had a hot date, but really I was going to the dentist.  One of my FB friends told me to go back tomorrow and tell them that I got drilled. That's a great idea.  I think I'll do that.  As I was walking out the door, Brian asked me where I was going.  When I told him I had a hot date, he said, "It had better be with me!" 

Yes, Former Group Leader Rod got some cookies, too.  He asked what kind they were, and I said, "What kind do you think?"

He said, "They look like peanut butter."  I replied, "Exactly!  I know what you like."  So Former Group Leader Rod was happy, too.

Seems everyone was happy today, except me.  Some years, I do OK on Valentine's Day.  Other years, it's a very hard day for me.  This has been a difficult year.  

Oh, I put on my brave face and smiled through work.  I put on my brave face and smiled through my dentist appointment --as much as one can smile through a dentist appointment, that is. I laughed, and joked with Vanessa and the guys, but my heart wasn't in it.

Now, this agonizingly long day is finally, blessedly over.  And I'm going to bed.

To dream of love--or as is more likely, dinosaurs, zombies, terrorists, or pedicurists.  Such is my life, and my sleep.

.

All Ready

for Valentine's Day.  Except for that piddlin' little detail about not having, you know, a Valentine.

I got two hats finished.  This one is for TK.  

And this one is for The Other Rod.

I had a little trouble with his hat. See, Rod likes red. I mean he really likes red. In all the years I've known him, I don't think I've ever seen him without something red on.  I really wanted to knit him a red hat. The only thing is, I didn't have any more red yarn, and I didn't have time to run up to Southaven and buy some. So, I copped out and bought some Red Heart.  Yeah, I know, but I doubt he'd know the difference.  Besides, if I'd bought him a hat in the store, it would be acrylic anyway.  So I got some Red Heart.

It was supposed to be worsted weight, but it was soooo thick-- almost a heavy worsted or light bulky.  It was like knitting with rope.  I probably should have gone up a needle size, but by the time I realized I probably should have gone up a needle size, it was too late to turn back.  If I'd had more time, but no, I had to get it finished today, so I can take it in the morning.  Still, it got done, and has been washed and dried to soften it up a bit. 

I didn't have time to knit Vanessa a hat, so I pulled this purply one out of the gift drawer.

 

I hope she likes it. I don't recall ever seeing Vanessa wear hats, but I wanted to make her something, too, since she's been such a good friend to me.

Finally, I made cookies. 

Chocolate chip for me, Brian, and The Other Rod,

and peanut butter for Vanessa, TK, and Former Group Leader Rod.  I got cute little treat bags to put them in, but I still have plenty left over.  Sigh, I'm never going to lose weight this way. 

At least it's going to be warm enough to walk the dog this week.  That's what I've been missing.  I love our walks, it's just getting up out of the chair that's the hard part.

So, who wants to call me every afternoon at 4:00 PM and tell me to get off my ***?   (Except tomorrow.  I have to go to the dentist.)

Plans

Secret plans...

So, I mentioned yesterday how Vanessa and I are going to make Valentine's Day stuff for The Other Rod and TK-- also known as our babies.

Today, I got the brilliant idea that I would knit them all hats, Vanessa included. Of course, I didn't tell her about it. It wouldn't be a surprise if I did. I ran home and cast on a Hurricane Hat.

The question is, can I get three hats and two batches of cookies done by Monday?

I must knit....

Knit like the wind!

Did You Know

that they have football shaped Oreos?

Yep, it's true.  I have evidence.

And they really do look like footballs.

Unfortunately, the evidence is rapidly disappearing.  Good thing I took pictures.

Look who else followed me home from the store.

 

I hadn't intended to buy him.  I was looking for those little bags to put cookies and candy and stuff in.  See, Vanessa and I are going to make up Valentine's Day bags for T.K. and The Other Rod --not to be confused with Former Group Leader Rod.  I'm going to make cookies, and Vanessa is going to get some candy.   The Other Rod likes chocolate chip cookies, and TK likes peanut butter cookies, which means I'll have to make a batch of each.  Then, I'll have to make another batch of peanut butter, because Former Group Leader Rod will have a fit if I bring cookies for TK and not have enough for him.  I've never seen the like the way that man loves cookies. 

So, I was looking for the little treat bags and wandered down the Valentine's Day stuff aisle.  I hadn't intended to buy the little bear, but when I picked him up, he was just so soft and squishy that I couldn't put him down again. 

I had to reschedule my dentist appointment.  Strangely enough, I saw Dr. Moody in the store, and he told me that he could have done it, but his crew didn't make it in.  He said that one of his assistants called him and said that her husband had told her that if Dr. Moody wanted her to come to work, then he could drive out and get her.  So, we're rescheduled until Monday at 2 PM, which means I'll have to leave work early.

I ain't complainin....

Finally, a few more snow photos.

And I have a feeling this won't be the last snow we get this year, either.


I think the North moved South for the winter.

Why I Don't Date

Well, Valentine's Day is here once again, and while people are celebrating love everywhere, I will be sitting at home watching the Winter Olympics. No, I don't have a date for this weekend. I'm often asked why I won't date. But it's not so much that I won't date. It's just that I don't. Why? Because nobody asks me out. I'm not exactly sure why, but I do have my theories. It goes way back...

Before I went into the Navy, I worked a couple of years at Wal-mart. For part of that time, there was this guy who also worked there. His name was Tony. I liked him, and for a while I thought he liked me. Looking back now, though, I'm not so sure.

Anyway, one afternoon some of my cousins got to jawing about who could out hunt who. Naturally, this led to a "prove it" moment, so that night three of my cousins and I went hunting. Now, at that time, and in that state, spotlighting for rabbits was legal. Make sure you check your state and local hunting laws before hunting anything. There was a bumper crop of rabbits that year, and between the 4 of us, we killed 9 of them.

The next day, when I went back to work, Tony asked me what I had done on my day off. I told him, and he said, "Oh, I went rabbit hunting, too. How many did you kill?" I told him, and "NINE???? I've never killed nine rabbits in one night in my life!!!" I pointed out that there were 4 of us hunting, and he said, "Yeah, but NINE!" I said that it wasn't like I'd killed all nine by myself. I'd only killed three. "Yeah, but NINE!" Things got very cool between us for a while.

A few weeks later, my cousin's husband told me that when he was a little boy, he used to kill robins, cook them with rice, and eat them. In retrospect, I think he was pulling my leg, but at the time, I was young enough and naive enough--and let's face it, I didn't want to think he would lie to me like that--so I believed him.

Over the course of a several days, I went out and killed a couple dozen robins, the amount I had been told was needed to make up a good pot of robin and rice. I cleaned them, then carried them over to my Aunt Martha's and asked her to cook them for me. She did, and I ate them. I decided I didn't like robin and rice, and haven't killed any since then. But I'm getting off track...

I had another day off of work, so I decided I'd just stay out in the woods until I'd gotten enough robins to make up my 24. The next day, I went back to work and Tony--who was finally talking to me again--asked me what I'd done on my day off. When I told him, he said, "I went robin hunting, too. How many did you kill?" I told him, and "FIFTEEN?????" he exclaimed. "I've never killed 15 robins in my life!"

"What kind of gun did you use?" I asked, though I'm not sure why.

"A .22 with scope," was his reply.

Now, I don't claim to be an expert on men, and back then I knew even less than I do now, but one thing I do know is when to shut up. I knew then that that was a good moment to shut up. (In the intervening 20 some odd years since this happened, I now know that I probably should have shut up about 2 minutes earlier, but I didn't.) "Oh," was all I said.

"Why?" Tony asked. "What kind of gun did you use?" I didn't want to answer, but Tony was insistent. Finally, I rather reluctantly told him,

"A BB gun."

Do you know, that boy never spoke to me again.

I lost a friend that day, but I gained something more important. I gained knowledge, and what I learned from my encounter with Tony was that men don't want me the way that I am. So for years, I tried to be what I thought a man wanted in a woman. And I never wanted for a boyfriend. Even after I got out of the Navy, the men were still there. The offers were still plentiful.

But then, about 10 years ago, I decided I was tired. Tired of pretending to be someone I'm not. Tired of acting like the bubble-headed, big-boobed bimbo. And let's face it, I wasn't fooling anyone with the boob thing anyway. But most of all, I was tired of dumbing myself down to meet men's expectations. So I quit. I dropped all pretense, and went back to just being me.

In an instant, the dates, the phone calls, the interest just stopped, as quickly and completely as if someone had flipped a switch. I haven't had a date since. But you know what? I'm OK with that. If someone doesn't want me the way I am, then he doesn't deserve to have me.

Maybe, someday, someone will come along and want me. ME. But if that never happens, I'm content with who I am.

And that's all that matters.

Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day is probably my least favorite of holidays.

I am single. I have been single all of my life, except for a brief stint at marriage which I don't even count because my ex and I never lived together. (Long story--military involved.) At this point, I see a long future ahead of me in which I remain single.

Most of the time, I am OK with that. I was looking around at my life just the other day and wondering where I would put a man if I found one.

But on this day...

This day with all of its emphasis on love, and couples, and togetherness...

On this day it hits me. Some years harder than others. This is a bad year.

I watch the flowers and balloons being delivered, and I know that there will be none for me. I watch the commercials for dinners and jewelry, and I know that there will be none for me. I watch people crowding in the holiday aisles at the stores buying gifts, and I know that there will be none for me.

On this day, I am alone. Forgotten.

Like the cotton on the edges of the fields. The cotton that doesn't get picked. Forlorn. Bedraggled. Forgotten.

Having endured the winter, it waits.

It waits...only to find itself mowed down to make way for a new crop.

And soon, no one will even remember that it once grew there.

Valentine's Day Advice

I heard this on the radio this morning and in the spirit of Valentine's Day, I thought I'd share. A survey was done asking people what makes a bad kisser. These are the answers:

What Makes A Bad Kisser?

The number one answer was: Failure to control saliva (I am so glad I'm not alone on this one!). Coming in second was: too much tongue. The other answers, in no particular order, were: teeth in the way, biting, not enough tongue, and other. The guy on the radio said he didn't want to think about what that other category entailed, but I have a few of my own. Tight or tense lips make a bad kisser. It's like kissing a corpse. Kissing with too much pressure makes a bad kisser. Seriously, if I want swollen and bruised lips, I'll get into the sparring ring. Kind of going along with that is kissing so hard that the kissee feels you are going to break her neck. This is uncomfortable and does not inspire romantic feelings. It's just bad kissing. Creating a suction in the kissee's mouth makes a bad kisser.

Now for my personal favorite, or should I say, my ex's personal favorite. If you want to be a really bad kisser, try this. Wait until you are in the middle of a passionate, deep kiss, then take a deep breath--through your nose, of course--and blow as hard as you can into the kissee's mouth causing her discomfort and possibly damaging her lungs. Do that, more than once, and you will have earned yourself the title of Really Bad Kisser.

Still on the topic of Valentine's Day, I read an article online about the ten worst V Day gifts. The entire article is here, but I've summarized the list below, and the explanations the article gave as to why these may be bad choices:

1. Red Roses--because they are such a cliche'
2. Candy--because there will always be an icky one in the assortment
3. Any jewelry in a ring sized box, other than the ring--can we say awkward moment?
4. Cutsie girly stuff like sachets or wishing stones--dust collectors with no useful purpose

5. Stuffed Animals--what are grown folks going to do with a bunch of stuffed animals anyway?

6. Lingerie--face it, dude, you buy the lingerie for you, not her
7. Small Appliances--If she needed it, she would have it already
8. Perfume--because you might pick a fragrance she hates
9. Tie--he's got plenty of ties already.
10. A Gift Certificate--what can be less romantic than handing someone a price tag?

The article made some good points, and some points I didn't agree with. For example, the candy one. Sure there will be some candy that is less liked than others, but that is part of the fun of assorted chocolates. It's in the surprise. But the article also offers practical solutions.

Me? I'll be spending my Valentine's Day with the allergist. Fun fun. But the kids are out of school, so I'm making Cody go with me. After I get through with my appointment, we are going to go to the Mississippi Museum of Natural Science. Now, that really does sound like fun!

Looking for Love: Almost three year old male corn snake looking for a sexy babe. Forty-four inches long, a bit chubby, but still sleek enough for a hot chick. Come home with me baby, and we'll watch the Sunset together. Call 1-800-Luv-Corn. (Not a real phone number. Don't try to call.)